Monday, December 28, 2009
So here's Round Three of my confessions
1. When I watch television shows on DVD I have to look a the title of each show, and read the summary. It's true, even if I've seen the show before I still have to do it. I hate the "Play All" button.
2. My alarm clock goes off three separate times in the morning because I like to wake up slowly, I'm guessing this is one of the many positive aspects to living alone since I suspect if anyone else had to listen to three alarms each morning things wouldn't be so pleasant
3. Despite my tendency to ramble on and on, I have actually gone an entire 24 hours without speaking, at all. And I did it just to see if I could (cause I'm weird like that).
4. I hate cold weather but am to cheap to turn my heat above 65 unless I have guests over and then I do it out of guilt.
5. I get horribly embarrassed by awkward people doing embarrassing things on TV and therefore can't watch most reality shows because they make me queasy and uncomfortable. And if I do watch them I do so with the remote in my hand ready to turn the channel if necessary.
6. While I never, in a million years, would ever want to be on The Real World, I am sad that I'm to old to be on it because it makes me feel...well, old.
7. No matter where I am, in any building, I always make sure to know the fastest way to the exit. Although nothing has ever happened to make this information necessary I like to be prepared just in case. (side note: B, don't pretend like you don't do the exact same thing)
8. I like driving, a LOT, except for in the rain which sucks, or when going over a bridge.
9. I call it "E! Entertainment Television" Every. Single. Time. Deal with it
10. I've only been able to keep 1 New Year's Resolution in my entire life and it was this year so I'm quitting while I'm ahead and resolving to not make any more New Year's Resolutions
Farewell 2009...here's to a better and brighter 2010!!
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Now, I've gotten some pretty awesome things over the years. A LOT of chocolate, some adorable hand written cards, Christmas pins (which I always put on so the kids can see that i'm wearing them) but that first year, oh that first year....I got a present that trumps all other gifts. A gift that lives in infamy. A gift that I (and here's the big mistake) opened in front of the student......sexy pajamas
with a greese stain on them
and they were itty bitty
and I am not itty bitty
and yellow is not my color
You can imagine my surprise at this particular gift. After all, I had just opened a bag of christmas cookies, a new pin (which I was wearing), a Snow Globe with a students picture in it, and several cards. So when faced with a pair of yellow silk and lace short shorts and a tiny tank top I was left, for perhaps the first time ever, speechless. I stammered, I stuttered, I declined holding them up for the rest of the class to see, and I fled to my friends classroom as soon as I had taken my kids to PE. I was both relieved, and slightly horrified, to see that she had gotten a similar gift. And, while mine had a grease stain, she only got the top half of hers so clearly I was the winner.
Plus I learned a valuable lesson, and now, when faced with any sort of gift from a student I polietly accept, and then open them in PRIVATE!
Also, writing a thank you note to a 5th grader who has just given you sexy pajamas required all my creative writing skills to make it sound, you know, not creepy.
Friday, December 4, 2009
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
All Proceeds to benefit my Adoption Fund
**And this doesn't even included the Solid Cherry Dining table, or the additional carload, and a shed FULL of stuff being delivered later in the week.**
Sunday, November 29, 2009
And I did!
I resolved this year to finish making the tree skirt that I had begun 2 years previously. A tree skirt whose completion was interrupted by life and RA and a complete inability to use my hands for about a year. So I did, and after 3 years of working I must say that it was so worth the wait!
Now I have to think of a new resolution......I may have to revisit that be more sarcastic idea.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Today I'm thankful, enormously thankful, tremendously thankful, that Facebook wasn't around when I was in college (not that it was that long ago). College was fun, very fun, at times it was probably entirely too much fun, but it was also not plastered all of the internet. The things that I remember remain fond, if hazy, memories. The things that I've forgotten, well they are certainly better off forgotten. Those were carefree days when not every piece of electronic equipment housed a camera and you didn't have to worry about pictures from a party showing up online before you managed to stumble home (although some of those old school albums that keep popping up are pretty funny). And yes, I realize that I sound like my grandmother, waxing poetic about the Victrola and Model-T, but seriously not everything is meant for public consumption. Can you imagine all the dumb stuff I would have done? My mouth and brain were not always connected during those years so I can't imagine what I would have posted, or who I would have poked or stalked (well actually, yes I think we all know what that would have been...). I did, and do, enough embarrassing stuff without the help of the World Wide Web.
So for now, I will remain grateful that the most embarrassing thing I did at a computer back then was send the occasional sad and lame email, and write a lots and lots of really bad stories.
Sunday, November 8, 2009
The tour is led by Kyle Beltran (who just graduated from college in 09...how incredible). Beltran plays the lead role of Usnavi (originated by Lin-Manuel Miranda, the composer/lyricist of In the Heights). Although skeptical of anyone else in that role, I was completely convinced before the end of the opening number. His absolute enthusiasm on the stage made him a joy to watch. Not to be outdone, the rest of the cast delivered performances that were all their own while still remaining true to the characters that the Broadway cast has brought to life. Isabel Santiago (Daniela) was particularly amazing to watch, so much so that it is utterly impossible for me to imagine her as anything but her character. Aside from a spectacular voice, she has seemingly perfect comedic timing and delivered each line impeccably. Natalie Toro (Camila) was equally amazing and made me never, ever want to tick her off! Shaun Taylor-Corbett (Sonny) was fantastic and funny, and could garner laughs from the audience without saying a word.
I could talk about every cast member, as well as the crew, because they all put 100% of themselves into the show and made it incredible, so much so that after seeing it on Friday night I splurged and bought tickets to see it again on Saturday afternoon (totally worth it, budget be damned)!
I am actually very glad that I saw it again on Saturday because an interesting little thing happened. After the intermission, which seemed to last an extra long time, an announcement was made that the role of Usnavi would now be played by Shaun Taylor-Corbett. It was particularly fascinating for a dork like me to see how he was able to go from playing Sonny in the first act, to Usnavi in the second act (although I did wonder what prompted the change). He did a great job and I loved seeing how everything about him, from his tone of voice to the way he carried himself across the stage changed completly for this new character. I understand that this is what actors do, but seeing it so literally on the stage was particularly awesome.
If the tour is coming anywhere near you, you should seriously check it out. And, if you don't want to go alone, give me a call. After all, I've already blown the budget once, might as well do it again!
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
I've spent a LOT of time lately thinking about adoption, and money, and adoption, and money, and money, and money, and money which I hate because this is so not about the money. The thing is that I am 100% committed to adopting, but I'm also 100% committed to paying my bills. Which for me, means that the normal 18-24 month wait for this adoption may stretch out an extra year while I work my rear off making extra money. Until some of my bills get paid I cannot, in good faith, take on a loan to pay for this adoption. I would rather work and save for an extra year so that when I'm home with baby I can do things like pay for daycare, and food....
So my painting/babysitting/tutoring/housesitting/etc will continue in full force. I am still having the garage sale (my guest room is filling with stuff, you guys are awesome). I am accepting prayers of all shapes and sizes (the more the merrier)!! And I will keep working, and saving, and paying off debt because I still know that my daughter is out there and that she'll come home when the time is right!
Sunday, September 27, 2009
I'm going to be collecting stuff to sell in a garage sale over the next several weeks. If you are local, have stuff to get rid of, and are willing to donate it to my sale please let me know. I'll even come pick up anything that I can fit into my car. You know what they say...one man's trash is another woman's Bulgarian Adoption Fund!
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
As I was bringing in the trash can I noticed something strange out of the corner of my eye. At the bottom of the gate there was something that just wasn't right. Upon further inspection I found a turtle, a little turtle, a little cute turtle that had wedged itself between 2 parts of the fence. It was completly vertical and absolutly stuck. In fact, I thought it was dead at first and almost didn't bend down for a closer look (I've had dead turtles in the yard before...gross). I felt so bad thinking about the little guy that I had to look and, to my relief, the turtle moved. I tried to pull it out but it kept making a strange squeaking noise. Did you know turtles can squeak? Yeah, neither did I, I was afraid I was going to smash it (double gross). Well it took some work, and some garden tools (covered in gloves so I didn't pierce anything) but I did manage to make a lever and make enough space between the two pieces of wood to get the little guy out! I put him in the flower bed and he promptly burrowed himself under the mulch! I'm taking this as a win for turtle-kind.
This story is so much better with pictures, but alas, while I was able to snap some shots of the incident I can't upload them. My camera is experiencing an epic fail, the result of landing in the sand while on a trip to Lake Erie. But on the bright side a new camera seems like a great gift for the mom-to-be (hint hint)!
p.s. I can't find the spell check button on this new version of blogger....what's up with that? Also, I suck at spelling, sorry!
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Why Bulgaria, why now? I have been looking at adoption programs since last year. Every time I would get interested in a program something would happen and I'd decide that it wasn't the right one for me. Then this summer I got the latest edition of the Wittenberg Magazine and found this article on the last page. It was about a documentary that a fellow alumnus made about Bulgarian adoption. As they say, one thing led to another and I found myself looking at a slide show of children who had been adopted from Bulgaria...as I watched it became very clear to me that this was the program for me! And so it began.......
So why the heck didn't you tell me this in person you jerk! I started this process at the end of July and at that point I didn't know if I would even be a eligible to adopt from Bulgaria. In fact, after submitting my pre-application I was asked to submit further information about my medical history. Until I got that phone call last week I honestly didn't know if this would ever happen. Not telling people was hard! But, telling people and then having it fall through would have been even harder!!
So when are you coming home with a baby? Bulgaria only recently reopened to international adoption and their government, and the Minister of Justice in particular, have been doing a wonderful job of improving and stream-lining the process. All that being said, the current time line from application to coming home is 18-24 months. My agency is very quick to say that this is only an estimate, there is always a chance that it could take more or less time. I have plenty of time to get ready and figure out how to pay for it all.
Speaking of money, how are you going to pay for this? The short answer to that question is that I have NO idea! Seriously folks we're talking beg, borrow, and steal (well maybe not steal). I have several grants I can apply for once my home study is done, and am going through Financial Peace University to help me manage my money better! I am going to have to get a loan for part of it, and I'm just going to work my rear off. I've already let the word out that I'm back in the painting/house sitting/babysitting/whatever business. And, I'm going to be doing a lot of praying. While the money part of this is probably the scariest and most overwhelming, I am confident that it'll all work out!
I am sure there are lots more questions out there, and I'm happy to answer all of them. Thanks to everyone for all of their good wishes already. This is a crazy journey I'm embarking on and I'll take all the love and prayers I can get!!!
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Yeah, that's right. I started looking at this program in July and had to get some information together about my RA and from my Doctor before I was even allowed to apply, then I had to wait for the agency to approve my application before I could officially start the paperwork. Well, the agency just called about 30 minutes ago! I can hardly believe it, you see the only thing I've ever known that I wanted to be when I grew up was a Mom. Sure I had dreams of being an author, Broadway star, and world traveller, but even in all of those I was still a mom. And right now just seems like the perfect time. I know there are about a million logical reasons why I shouldn't be doing this right now (mainly the state of my bank account), but overwhelming all of those reasons is the simple fact that I am absolutely certain that this is the best decision I've ever made in my entire life. Do I think it's going to be easy? No! Do I think it's going to be amazing? Without a doubt! Now I'm sure that I'll have LOTS to say about this in the coming days and weeks but right now I'm just to excited to type!
p.s. This is a long process, the estimated time from application to coming home with a child is 18-24 months.
p.p.s. Don't be mad if I didn't tell you in person. There are very few people who even knew I was thinking about doing this, let alone actually doing it!
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Ella only a few months after coming home!
Saturday, August 8, 2009
I love hats, and I'm not talking baseball here people. I'm talking about Hats with a Capital H. Hats that were part of ensembles. Hat's with feathers and bows. BIG hats that cover your entire head, and little hats that only cover a part of your hair. Sadly, I don't wear hats. Sadly, most people don't wear hats. Sadly, hats are not "in". But oh, how I wish they were. I wish I had a hat to go with every outfit. And hat boxes and hat pins for each one.
Perhaps if I had been born 50 years ago I could have had the hats of my dreams. Of course then it would also be 50 years ago and I would have things like the Internet or Deadliest Catch. Still, it would be nice to be able to buy and wear the hats that I long for. I suppose that until time travel becomes a reality, or hats come back into fashion, I'll have to just slap on a baseball hat and pretend it's adorned with bow and flowers and that people don't think I'm crazy for loving hats!
Cordelia on the other hand is the one who wants to kill me. She's a wild beast. She is also the one who, at the moment, is unnecessarily angry at me for changing her kitty litter to a new brand. Cordelia is the one who pooped in her bed and, most recently, decided to pee in my dog's food dish. Yeah, that's just want I love to come home to...dog food congealed in cat pee.
If you think that's gross, your right. And it's probably worse than you are imagining.
I am determined to not let Cordelia beat me. I've cleverly put a thin layer of her old litter over the new stuff in the litter box. Let's hope Cordy emerges soon and gives it a shot because I'm so over cleaning crap up all over the house, the litter box is gross enough!
Sunday, July 19, 2009
It doesn't seem safe, or smart. And really, if you run you probably do it for your health so I'd think you'd be concerned with getting hit by a car. I'm just saying...
Thursday, July 16, 2009
One of the many glamorous things about having RA is that my immune system isn't quite up to snuff. You see having RA means that my immune system thinks that the fluid surrounding my joints is evil and attacks it causing swelling, pain, and super sexy claws where my hands should be. Clearly my immune system takes the short bus to work. Now, because it's my immune system that is the problem the medications I take suppress my immune system so it can't attack my joints. I'm all about the medication because it's one of the reasons why I am now able to do things like dress myself (I'm a big kid now), but having a immune system that doesn't fire at 100% means that infections are a real concern.
Keeping this in mind I became concerned when I noticed a large, red, warm lump under my arm (I'm to dignified to say armpit). A major infection could easily land me in the ER which I have tried to avoid since my senior year at Witt when I broke a finger by falling off my porch, sober. After several days I did what most people do, I told my mommy who made me call the doctor, who made me come in to the office. So I found myself on the exam table about to get Harold (as I like to call the lump) lanced. I admit I was pretty excited about this because, well I'm weird and I wanted to see what was going to come out of Harold. I was fully numbed before the scalpel came out so I didn't actually feel anything, but I could hear the scalpel and ahhh, like nails on a chalkboard. Not even the crap coming out of Harold could make up for that noise. Also, because Harold is the gift that keeps on giving, I've been having to apply and reapply bandages to the area ever since then. Do you know how much it hurts to remove medical tape from your armpit (guess I'm not that dignified after all)? Especially when there is an incision there? And it bruised from trying to squeeze Harold to death? It hurts. Yesterday I actually used this sentence in conversation "I couldn't get on the treadmill today because my armpit hurt". For real people do you know how often your armpit moves during the day? A LOT! But still as the saying goes "better out than in" and I'm frankly ready for Harold to move on, and take his crap with him (even if it is kind of cool, in a gross way).
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
See here's the difference, I like to write and I write when I feel like it. I blog, or journal, or type things into files that will never see the light of day. I start stories, and more stories, and write scenes, and make plans that I never follow through on. Some months I'll write a lot, some months I won't write at all. I use entirely to many italics (and parentheses).
But a Writer, well a writer writes everyday. They write even when the words won't come, they write when they feel like it and when they don't. They put pen to paper just to put pen to paper. They are much, much more disciplined than I. They have the skill and ability to take words and thoughts and dreams and ideas and turn them into the stories that we read.
And here's my secret (shh) I've always wanted to be a Writer. To be able to take the scenes and stories that run rampant through my brain and put them on the page and make them as real as they are in my head. I want to be able to influence, and inspire, to make people laugh or cry based on my words. I want to be a writer, but I may have to settle on just being a person who writes.
Monday, July 6, 2009
Sunday, July 5, 2009
When exactly did that happen? When did I get old? When did I stop being able to stay up all night and still function the next day? When did a half of beer start being enough to make me tipsy? When did I become someone who worries about paying the mortgage? I could swear to you that Wittenberg seems a like a lifetime ago, and that it just happened.
But like with all things I do have some regrets about college, I know I should have studied more, I should have had more confidence in myself, I should have studied abroad, I should have had the guts to confess my crush on you know you who. Still, despite those regrets, college was fun. Really, really, really fun. And I have friends from college who I still talk to. And I recently discovered that even after 9 years you can reconnect and have fun with old college friends. I'd love to go back, but only to visit. I'm not sure I could make that daily trudge up the hill from the KD house to...well any building on campus. I'm fairly certain that I wouldn't be able to cart heavy books around the bookstore, and I know I couldn't drink as much. But it sure would be fun to wake up in the cold dorm on a snow day and spend the morning watching the Price is Right waiting for Joann to tell us that lunch was ready, and then spending the afternoon in the Commons reading and writing and "studying" and gossiping about what had happened the night before...
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Oh yeah, wild animals are not meant to be kept as pets. I'm not even convinced that domesticated animals are truly domesticated. Sure, my dog is personally afraid of her own farts and wouldn't ever turn on me but my cat? Oh she'd eat me in a second. She started life as this tiny adorable furball.
But even when she was tiny and (seemingly) innocent, I could see the wheels turning in that evil little brain of hers. See right now she's thinking "I could totally take that".
Yes, here's the thing. Sometimes when Cordelia looks at me I know she's thinking "If I weighed 200 lbs more, I'd eat you. And I'd like it". So if my cute, adorable (sometimes evil) "domesticated" cat is secretly hatching plans to kill me in my sleep, what's to stop a tiger from doing it? The answer is nothing, but still people are surprised when their wild animals turn on them. They go on the news and cry about how they never imagined that their beloved pet (ha) could turn on them. Hello? It's a wild animal, you don't see me bringing a gorilla into my house to dress up and feed with a bottle. So here's the thing, lets keep the wild animals in the wild where they belong. Also, if you have a cat like mine, watch your back!
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Confession: I'm afraid to exercise
Yes, it's true, my treadmill frightens me. I bought my treadmill several years ago when the one I inherited from my parents needed to go to exercise equipment heaven. When I bought it, I loved it. I would get up early 3-4 times a week to walk before work (if you know me personally then this will have extra significance since you probably know how I feel about sleep)! I felt great, I loved how I felt after walking, I had more energy, I was actually alert on my drive to work. It was all in all, a good thing.
Then I got RA and the treadmill became my enemy. I couldn't even walk to the bathroom without being in pain so the idea of doing extra walking, on purpose, was laughable. I spent a lot of time (I'm talking more than a year) altering the way I did everything to try and keep pain to a minimum. I started walking with my hands in my pockets (less chance of hitting something on accident), I got all new (flat and boring) shoes, I started avoiding touching people (if a kid accidentally bumping into you in the hallway made you cry and vomit you'd avoid it too). All in all I did everything, everyday, to minimize or avoid pain, and I am not being dramatic when I say that it's all I thought about.
Then I started to get better (by the grace of God), but despite that I still continued living in my "avoid all possible pain" way which included ignoring the treadmill in my bedroom. But now I'm 20 months into this battle, 18 months post-diagnosis, and 6 months into feeling pretty much normal (well as normal as I ever was). It's time for things to change, to get over the fear that any physical activity will lead directly to intense pain, to take my doctors advice and get moving. While I'm still likely to walk with my hands in my pockets (I'm a klutz), and avoid handshakes (can I wear a sign that says "this isn't a pissing contest just a handshake, go easy"), it's time to conquer the treadmill.
p.s. sorry for the gratuitous use of parentheses (but I really like them).
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Come on, admit it. You know you've done it too.
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Blah and boring!
Friday, June 5, 2009
Well if SHE could do it, then darn it so could I. I promptly headed to Home Depot and bought a complete toilet repair kit that promised to be "easy to install". The box even declared "easy to install", the guy at Home Depot who I asked about it said "easy to install". HA, it was definitely NOT easy to install. Factor in my RA which means my hands have very little strength, and screws that are so corroded that they literally disintegrate when you touch them, this Easy to Install system ended up taking me 1 week, 1 visit from my mom, 1 call to our pastor, 1 visit from said pastor, and 1 new tool courtesy of said pastor. (Dad is currently in Israel, hence my calling our other pastor for help). But, after Mom and Pastor Alex helped me unscrew the tank from the bowl I was able to do the rest of the install myself, and I'm pretty darn pleased!!
Finally the tank comes off! All it took was 2
extra days, and 2 extra helpers.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Summer is awesome.
Don't be a hater, we teachers know you mock us only because you're jealous. Trust me when I say that 180 days of kids more than earns me my summer vacation. If you don't believe me then I invite you to come visit my classroom next year. I'll be there all year, dealing with kids, and their parents, and IEPs, and correcting IEPs, and correcting IEPs again, and just fixing the IEPs myself because I'm tired of editing and having my teachers not actually fix anything. I'll have girls crying because their best friend "like totally gave me a dirty look on the bus and my life is so over". I'll have boys masturbating in class (yep, every year...not cool). I'll have girls getting their period for the first time ever and freaking out about it. I'll have parents who don't give a rats ass about their kid and who I never actually meet although their phone number is on my speed dial. I'll have kids fail, and I have kids succeed. I'll have endless meetings and mountains of paperwork. I'll have papers to grade, and standardized tests to give and lots and LOTS of Diet Coke. Its a loud, crazy, hormonal, annoying, fun, nutty world and I bet you wouldn't last a day.
Did I mention that Summer is awesome?
Thursday, May 21, 2009
I have know this kid for years, taught him as a 4th grader, and again this year. Over the years he has made very little progress in school. I recently had to explain to someone who works with him on a daily basis that, no sorry he's not going to "grow up", this is about where his maturity level stops. He can be very sweet and fun in the classroom, but can also be a huge pain in the rear. He is not the easiest child to work with, but also not the worst. But here's the thing, he doesn't even know his address or phone number, and I KNOW he's capable of learning, and memorizing them. I have kids in the MOID class that know their addresses for heavens sake. And what really kills me is that his parents know his ability level, they know that he needs lots and lots and lots of help with everything. And yet they don't bother to update their contact information when their address/phone numbers change. I've been telling him all year that he absolutely needs to learn his address. As a matter of personal safety he needs to know where he lives. I stood in the office getting more and more annoyed that I couldn't find someone to get this kid and I had to keep reminding myself that it wasn't his fault. Because it really isn't his fault that he doesn't know these things, but it is his parents fault. If you have a child with a disability you need to be more involved, not less. And it kills me that they aren't. That he had to watch me call number after number after number trying to find someone who gave crap about the fact that he wasn't home yet. It kills me that I had to call the school social worker to come and get him, and that I had to make him describe his house to me before I let him go because I wanted to be sure that he would recognize it when he saw it. And it kills me that I was getting more and more annoyed with him while it was happening, Yes, it was well past time for me to leave work. Yes it was the 2nd to last day of school. Yes I am tired, but that is no excuse. I don't want to be that teacher, or that person. Mostly I think I was mad that I seemed more concerned about this kid than his parents and that is the most messed up part of this whole thing.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
For the record, I'm kind of an idiot.
RA taught me many things, including the fact that sometimes you just have to ask for help. I still don't do it well, but I do ask when necessary (even if I have to give myself a pep talk first). So this week has been a lesson in asking for help, and I'm pretty darn proud of myself! My rheumatologist agreed to let me try and lower the dose of one of my meds, as a result I've been feeling a bit off. When I went to the grocery store and bought lots of heavy items, the idea of loading them into my car was a bit much so when the bag boy offered to take them to the car for me I accepted, for the first time ever! Today at Lowes when I had to buy mulch I decided not to repeat last years performance (it ended with tears and no mulch), instead I went right in and asked someone for help.
Either I'm growing as a person, or I'm becoming more Southern....either way, it's a good thing!
Monday, May 11, 2009
I'm at the grocery store and I need to buy bread for sandwiches. Now, when I'm in the mood for sandwiches I usually eat them for 2-3 days in a row and then I'm cashed out for a good month. But there is way more than 2-3 sandwiches worth of bread in a loaf. Why can't you buy a half loaf of bread? Really, I know I could freeze it but it just doesn't taste the same when you thaw it (despite what Bridget may say).
While I begrudgingly mow my lawn and take out the trash I can't help but think that this is a man job. Yeah, I know that basically makes me a bad woman but whatever. Before you sic the scary feminists after me let me just say that I'm all for women's rights. And as a woman it's my right to not have to do certain things. Just stick me on a time-machine and send me back to 1950. Hasn't anyone come up with a business plan for situations like this? There should be a number I can call to get someone to come do the "Man chores" around the house (lawn, trash, anything to do with the car).
Huh, on second thought maybe I don't need a relationship. I just need more money so I can get a lawn service and a maid....
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Okay, maybe it's just me but I thought of that sketch yesterday when I got Internet connected to my phone. Now I'll admit to being a bit phone obsessed (I know I'm not the only one), but I always swore that I wouldn't get Internet on my phone. Who needs it? I have a computer, plus fancy new high-speed Internet, clearly I have no need for the Internet on my phone. I was very adamant about this, self-righteous even....oh how the mighty do fall.
Of course I remember making the same oaths against texting, and phones with keyboards, and facebook, and blogging, but clearly those didn't work out :) So yesterday I get the Internet hooked up to my phone and I found myself sitting on the couch, looking up facebook on my phone. On my tiny 1x2 in square phone screen. The best part? My computer was sitting next to me, open, connected to the Internet, and logged on to facebook.
I at least had the presence of mind to laugh at myself! And to consider the fact that if someone wanted to become a hermit in this day and age it would be way more fun with all the technology we have now. Yeah, don't ask my mind works in mysterious ways...
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
If someone calls me begging for money chances are they're not getting it. And if they're claiming to be a friend/family I'm so totally going to test them to see if it's really them, and then I'm still not going to send them cash (sorry folks). Plus, I'm pretty sure that if someone were to call claiming to be B, then I'd realize it wasn't her by the sound of her voice. If not I'll ask the ultimate question that only B would be able to answer "tell me about the greatest nap ever". Ditto for my sister, "what's the name of that girl who got your hermit crab" or any family member, "what kind of plastic surgery did I have"?
But before I did all that, before I gave the third degree to someone on the phone, before I let some stranger go on and on and on about how they need money, before all that I'm going to remember this.
Don't...Be...Dumb (and then I'll probably hang up and laugh because I'm smarmy like that).
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
I know what you're thinking.... Mac and Cheese doesn't make a sound.
But it does, and it's horrible. It sounds just like the word moist. And I really hate the word moist (even more than the sound of mac and cheese). It's just gross, and dirty, and, well moist. It's almost enough to prevent me from making it, almost. Perhaps earplugs would help.
Monday, May 4, 2009
On the other hand I'm not sure that I really needed those 36 individual cups of applesauce, but that didn't stop me from buying them! I will take credit for showing incredible self-control while wandering past the school supply aisle (3 times). Oh, the school supply aisle! I could devote an entire blog to my love of school supplies. While buying 2 pounds of beef jerky is something that I hope to never do; the sight of 24 multi-colored fine-tipped roller ball pens left me weak in the knees. To say nothing of the sharpie markers, and post-its, and paper, and more pens. I can't believe I made it out of there without a single item from that aisle. I only made it out by thinking about the start of next school year, when I can buy school supplies to my hearts content...............
Sunday, May 3, 2009
This weekend my sister, niece, and I made a trip to Hilton Head to visit friends who were there for Spring Break. I've been to Hilton Head many times and each time I realized more and more that this is my kind of beach. It's nice and relaxed (at least in April), the beach isn't to crowded (at least in April), and the food is great (even if you don't like seafood). We had a fantastic time, and it ended way to soon. Ella actually cried when we left, and I couldn't blame her!!
Monday, April 27, 2009
The really great part about this test, and others like it, is that if the students do really well on it...they make it harder! And all of those sped kids who we have to individualize education for? Well tough shit kid. You have to take, and pass, the same test. It doesn't matter that you can't add, or that you read on a 1st grade level, or that we give you an individualized education plan so that you can be successful at school, at the end of the day you still have to pass the same test as everyone else. So lets forget about the fact that over the course of the year Johnny has increased his reading level from 2nd to 5th grade. Let's forget that Sally now knows how to borrow in subtraction. I'd love to be able to say "nice job" and "way to go", but instead I have to say...."hells bells kids you suck."
How about the people are in charge of these things come and visit my classroom for a day. I'm willing to bet it would open their eyes to a whole different world :)
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Turns out I was wrong. I discovered that by getting a package deal, and cancelling AOL I'm actually saving money while getting to enjoy high-speed Internet for the first time in my house. Plus I can get cable back!! Please don't think me to pathetic that this fills me with joy. I've had the Discovery Channel on all day and I'm not tired of it yet! Who knew that I could enjoy faster Internet, the Discovery Channel, and pay LESS each month? Clearly I didn't know that or I would have done this a long time ago.
Welcome back Cable, welcome back.
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
However, when we got to Sea World I discovered the trouble with Tina Turner. Despite my notoriously bad memory, and my inability to remember much of anything before 1989, I have a fairly great sense of direction. If I visit a place (think theme park, mall, zoo) I can usually look at the map briefly and then be able to navigate my way around. This is possibly the only area where my memory is excellent (although I can remember a ridiculous number of lyrics from musicals). I entered Sea World confident in my ability to navigate the park. I had visited it before, and knew generally where everything was. But it seemed like no matter where I tried to go I got lost. Looking for the Whale and Dolphin Theater? I ended up at the Artic. Looking for Dolphin Cove..oops those are the Clydesdale's. Need a bathroom, well there's a gift shop.
I figured it was a fluke, but the next day when we went back to Sea World the same thing happened. My internal compass was perpetually set to "Middle of damn nowhere" and I usually got there by pushing directly against the crowds of people who knew what they were doing. I spend 1 day relaying on the GPS to get me somewhere and suddenly I can't even find the exit (and there were signs)! I'm going to the zoo on Thursday and I really hope my internal compass has turned back on.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Growing up in Michigan I knew what pollen was. We learned about it in Science class through the use of some really awesome film-strips. Pollen was the stuff that bees pick up as they fly from flower to flower. Pollen was the stuff that game some people the sniffles. Pollen was, above all else, invisible.
Then I moved to Georgia. Pollen, in Georgia, isn't hidden in pretty flowers. Pollen in Georgia descends upon the state in waves. It attacks like an invading army, leaving a trail of Kleenex and watery eyes in its wake. It falls from the trees in a thick shower of yellow powder that covers every available surface (inside and out) of the entire state. No one, and no place, is safe from pollen. And when it rains.... Oh you'd imagine that the rain would be great as it knocks the pollen out of the air, but you'd be wrong. When it rains the pollen puddles, and collects, and creates an oil slick on the road. It's gross. It gives everyone allergies. It means I can't use my porch until it ends. It means I have to add one more pill to my medicine cabinet. It sucks.
Right now I'm in a war against pollen...and the pollen is winning.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
p.s. Bonus points if you understand the Dead Poet reference!
Saturday, March 14, 2009
In my very first year of teaching I had a student who was a particular project of mine. I really wanted X to feel confident in their ability, and to learn to love school as much as I did (remember this was my first year, I was a bit delusional). X has a severe learning disability and was functioning far below the rest of the class, but still we slogged through it. Then one fateful day our entire team took a field trip to the local history museum. The docent who was working my group that day was a tiny old women who looked like she didn't know quite what to think about my students but she bravely carried on taking us through the history of the state. Periodically she would stop and ask the students questions and every time this ran through my head "please don't call on X please don't call on X". Before you think I'm a horrible person you must understand that this student would often answer volunteer to answer questions in class, and was called on frequently, but X's answers very, very rarely related to the question I had asked. "Why no dear, purple is indeed not a factor of 42, but good try."
Anyway back to the museum and the section on farming.
Docent: "Can anyone name one of the state's Cash Crops?"
Docent: "Excellent, anyone else?"
Docent 3: "Yes, great....how about you dear, in the back row, did you have an answer?"
Me (in my head): "Oh dear lord"
Student X: Celery
Yep, celery. I will give X points for understanding that a Crop has to do with something you plant. And bonus points to the docent who, after a moment of stunned silence, recovered well.
It was a great day at the museum, and I'm still laughing about it years later.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
I went to a Halloween party on a Saturday night in '07 dressed as a girl scout (it was awesome). The costume itself isn't significant, but the party is because I was driving that night so I stuck with one glass of wine and lots of water. The point being that I wasn't drunk and, despite my perpetual clumsiness, I didn't fall down. Still the next day my right ankle hurt and I was limping. By Monday my limp had turned into a full-fledged pain and I had a disturbingly large lump on the back of my ankle. My sister insisted that I call the doctor to see what was up, which I did a bit begrudgingly since I don't generally like visiting the doctor. My doctor agreed to see me the next day and when she saw my ankle she was stumped. There had been no apparent trauma to my leg or explanation for the giant lump. After some head scratching and a few looks in the medical textbooks she decided that my best bet was a visit to an orthopedic surgeon. An appointment was made for a week later and I headed home with a still swollen ankle, a more pronounced limp, and a little bit of anxiety over just what the heck was wrong.
I woke up on Wednesday to discover that not only was my ankle still sore, but now other parts of my body were following suit. By Friday my hands, wrists, back, feet, knees, and even jaw were also inflamed. Things didn't improve when I got a call from my mom telling me that her bosses wanted me to come in for some blood tests. My mom is a nurse at an Oncology practice, and although she told me not to worry...I did. Blood tests were run and it was decided that what I really needed was a Rheumatologist. A call was placed and I was given an appointment to see an amazing rheumatologist. The catch was that the appointment wasn't until January 18, 2009.
Now for those of you keeping track my symptoms started the day after a Halloween party. Within a week of that, nearly every joint in my body was inflamed and painful. My doctor's appointment wasn't until January 18! That left me with 2 and a half months to try and deal with my symptoms on my own. True, my regular doctor gave me a prescription anti-inflammatory as well as a dose of steroids, but overall there wasn't much to be done. Those months were not my best, and I'm sure I wasn't fun to be around. I slept very little because of the pain, and ate even less because my jaw was to sore to chew. When the day finally came for me to meet the rheumatologist I was happier than I had been in months! After a LOT of blood work, and another week of waiting for results it was confirmed that I had Rheumatoid Arthritis.
48 days later I turned 30....awesome
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Here's the big difference...my kids have a disability (have I mentioned that already?). I have students who are reading on a 2nd grade reading level. I have students who can't add (even with a calculator). I am expected to teach these kids how to cope with their disabilities, how to read, to write, to do math, how to function in the classroom. Oh yeah, and I'm supposed to teach them the same exact standards that everyone else teaches. Plus (and here's the real kicker), at the end of the year my kids have to pass the same standardized test as every other kid.
So, people of the world, I'm not sure what you consider a "real" teacher...but let me assure you that anyone with the word teacher as a job title is, indeed, a REAL teacher.
Monday, February 23, 2009
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Monday, February 16, 2009
Friday, February 13, 2009
This book was absolutely incredible. The Afghanistan that Hosseini writes about is one that I never even knew existed. Up until pretty recently the only Afghanistan I knew was the one on CNN. That Afghanistan is one filled with Taliban, and women covered in burqas. That Afghanistan is a strange and backward country, one that had no connection with my own. In this book Hosseini writes of a different Afghanistan. One with a proud and complex history. A country that has been torn apart by war and drought, but is also filled with poets and writers and people. A people that I'm ashamed to admit I never gave much thought to before. While this book is fiction, it still portrays a very real Afghanistan. This book was by no means easy to read. The content is rough, gritty and honest. The story pulls you in and spins you around for 372 pages before throwing out back out into reality. It is a book about love, faith, hope, and sacrifice. It is a story about powerful relationships, and about the power of relationships. Above all it is an incredible book that I would highly recommend to everyone!
This book has clearly cemented Khaled Hosseini as one of my favorite authors and has assured that I will buy and read anything that he writes in the future.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
I usually have to rely on my friend Kim and her excellent gift giving skills for my Vera Office Supplies since I'm to frugal...ummm cheap to buy them for myself. But today I learned the most wonderful thing. You can find some Vera at TJ Maxx! And it's on sale! I guess you really do "get the max for the minimum, minimum price". I'm telling you it was like discovering delicious fat-free cupcakes that taste like delicious fat-full cupcakes. I was able to fulfill all of my Vera Office Supply needs for 1/2 price. There was one office supply item that I couldn't find at the Max. The all new Vera Bradley Clipboard. I had to go to 3 different stores and pay full price for this beauty, but it was so worth it.
I'm telling you it was like Christmas and my Birthday all wrapped up into one glorious day!